ode to my car

Eibhlin · 03-08-2006, 04:39 PM

If you see me pull in
you'd best think again
before putting your Beamer next to me

my car is a smokin
filthy bucket of rust
leaks transmission fluid
and has no A.C.

dont touch it
i warn you
unless your shots are up to date
or a bad case of tetanus surely awaits!

in the parking lot of the gym
see my teeth baring grin
as i laugh at the spectacle i create

as i pull alongside
your 30,000 dollar ride
try to ignore the horrific smell
no the car is not on fire
the hood just contains
emissions from the bowels of hell

no the cars not on fire,
the smoke that you see
is the transmission fluid
that leaks steadily
and smokes readily
my car is determined
to humiliate me!

Little Bird · 03-08-2006, 06:33 PM

Ya know what....I know exactly what you mean!

I am sick of car trouble.

randallflagg · 09-03-2006, 08:20 PM

I don't understand your magnificent poem andrea,

'cause I have no car and driving licence.

Eibhlin · 09-04-2006, 04:46 PM

Lol, THANKFULLY we no longer own the car this poem is dedicated to. I now drive a super-sexy Ford Aerostar mini-van with a gimpy sliding door! When frustration with the door turns to poetic inspiration chances are I will add a new ode here-

ItBeThatWay27 · 09-04-2006, 08:06 PM

Car trouble sucks...

randallflagg · 09-04-2006, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eibhlin

Lol, THANKFULLY we no longer own the car this poem is dedicated to. I now drive a super-sexy Ford Aerostar mini-van with a gimpy sliding door! When frustration with the door turns to poetic inspiration chances are I will add a new ode here-

I can't await for your new car poetry!i'm sad 'cause it's true i have no car & licence drive , I live in Paris & i don't need car but I admire your passion for the cars. your mini-van , it look like the old mini van which younger Jewel had?or michael kelso(that 70's show) mini van?:lmao2:

Little Bird · 09-04-2006, 09:37 PM

My husbands car was sitting in our driveway for 6 months. We spent over €1500 (about $2000) buying new parts and paying mechanics and it was exactly the same even after all of that.

Luckily, I got a new job and a payrise to we bought a brand new car. We share it and still have my Opel Astra as our second car.

The new car we bought is a Nissan Almera. It doesn't rock my world or anything. It is practical and affordable but it's new and I love it!! Best bit is...it works!!! It doesn't break down, it doesn't judder at traffic lights. It doesn't reduce me to sweet talking or even begging it to work. It just works and works well. It also has climate control and with the summer we had, we used it!!

Here's what it looks like

http://www.nissan.ie/vehicles/passen...4/exterior.asp

last_dance_rodeo · 09-05-2006, 03:25 AM

oh that looks pretty i want that

ItBeThatWay27 · 09-05-2006, 11:18 AM

Juddering at traffic lights! thats funny b/c the Geo I was driving used to do that bad ha ha sometimes when I'd go to take off it would hesitate and kind of hold off for a second

if I could have any car in the world, it would definately be a Delorean DMC:

damn that car is sweet!

Eibhlin · 09-05-2006, 10:45 PM

lol! well, i may be inspired by the van soon, the door is so obnoxious!

gah, we have had so many gimpy cars--umm, over 14 in 10 years i think, i made a MySpace blog about it in fact :lmao2:

i would paste it here, but it would take half a web page:lmao2:

DreamsLast · 09-05-2006, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eibhlin

If you see me pull in
you'd best think again
before putting your Beamer next to me

my car is a smokin
filthy bucket of rust
leaks transmission fluid
and has no A.C.

dont touch it
i warn you
unless your shots are up to date
or a bad case of tetanus surely awaits!

in the parking lot of the gym
see my teeth baring grin
as i laugh at the spectacle i create

as i pull alongside
your 30,000 dollar ride
try to ignore the horrific smell
no the car is not on fire
the hood just contains
emissions from the bowels of hell

no the cars not on fire,
the smoke that you see
is the transmission fluid
that leaks steadily
and smokes readily
my car is determined
to humiliate me!

Have you ever heard of Adam Sandler's song called "Ode To My Car"???? The chorus includes the words "Piece of Sh*t Car, I've got a piece of sh*t car...."!!!!! It's frickin' hilarious!!!! This song was included on a comedy CD he put out several years ago. I could totally relate to that song back then when my car was breaking down like once a month. I was a broke college student with a car with 165,000 miles on it. It was so frustrating!

Here's a link, I think you can listen to a clip of it:

http://www.amazon.com/What-Hell-Happ...e=UTF8&s=music

Eibhlin · 09-05-2006, 10:49 PM

oh heck I will just post it

You read it right, in 11 years we have had 16 cars!!

1. 1994 Ford Ranger, red, it was a fun little truck. I call it the dating days truck because well, Joe had it when we first started dating and were first married. There are some good memories attached to it!

2. 1987 Jeep Cherokee Laredo, maroon, this was my first car. I loved it, it was alot of fun. Well aside from that pesky starter solenoid getting stuck. We had a hammer and piece of cardboard in the back of that thing, because when it didn't start, you had to crawl under it to bang on the starter to unstick it. I went 4 wheeling down the horse trails in it, it took us to NH and back a billion times, it was alot of fun. I miss it sometimes.

3. Buick LeSabre, light blue, this was the most reliable vehicle we ever had. And it had the COLDEST ac ever! Unfortunately it was destroyed in a head on collision with a Cadillac. I hate Cadillacs.

4. Subaru Legacy, dark gray, we owned this briefly while waiting for the insurance settlement. It was a good little car, we gave it to some friends who needed it more than we did.

5. 1993 Jeep Grand Cherokee, green, tan leather int. This could have been the best vehicle ever, it sure was pretty, and comfortable and looked good. But it didn't survive delivery driving and soon died. Biggest waste of $10,000 ever. Plus it would slip out of park and roll down the parking lot at Domino's, so if you own a Grand Cherokee years 93-98, use you parking brake!!!

6. 1991? Ford Taurus, piece of crap. Enough said. I "totalled" it by accidentally backing into Joe's Chevy. Smashed in the rear end of the car, barely scratched the trucks bumper. Imagine driving a car the drives crooked (bad alignment) and had the rear end smashed in. I wrote "My car is uglier than yours" on the trunk in black sharpie to lighten the mood.

7. 1991? Chevy corsica, red. This car was free, it was a good car for being on it's last leg. Then the spark plug blew out and wouldn't stay in anymore, so everywhere I drove it spewed exhaust fumes into the car while making a noise rivaling any helicopter, trust me, people KNEW when we were coming. Plus it would overheat and driving anywhere put at risk of carbon monoxide poisoning. But it was great til the spark plug incident!

8. 1994? Chrysler Concorde, black, gray leather interior. I liked this car alot, my aunt and uncle gave it to us, so it had alot of sentimetal value. It had a good stereo system too, which was fun. we eventually sold it.

9. Ford Aerostar, green, I never thought I would drive a Ford minivan, but here I am. It is a good van and it has cold ac and lots of room. I hope it runs for a long time so we don't have to make car payments for a long time!

10. 1994?? Ford F-150, red, this was my dad's truck. We inherited it last year after my dad died of cancer. It is a great truck, and just in time for Joe to have it for his installation business! Thank you dad and Mary!

Joe's trucks:

11. 1976? Ford F-100, what a piece of crap! And to think we spent so much money trying to fix it up! the real kicker is that the roof was so rusted that when we sold it, the guy who bought it from us was driving down the highway and the roof BLEW OFF! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

12. 198?? Chevy full sized pick up. This was a really good truck, until the engine blew. It is still missed, well its still sitting in our driveway, but we miss driving it.

13. Dodge Dakota, this truck was...interesting! Lol, it was good for what we paid for it and it lasted a while for us too.

Honorable mentions:

14. 1981 Chevy Camaro, metallic blue, it was pretty, and that is as far as it went. It looked good and didnt run for crap!

15. 1976? Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme, bug ugly metallic gold. Yes, I said metallic gold. It was Joe's car. Enough said!

16. 197?? Toyota little pickup, it was a beater. Joe drove it on the dirt roads a few times, then we gave it back.

I think that is it, I HOPE that is it!! Rigth now in addition to our van and truck we have a Cavalier we are going to fix up and sell, and Joe has a 77 Honda 450 he is going to fix up and keep.

03-08-2006, 04:39 PM	#1
Eibhlin Oscillating Fan Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: North Cackalacky Posts: 2,044 Rep Power: 254	If you see me pull in you'd best think again before putting your Beamer next to me my car is a smokin filthy bucket of rust leaks transmission fluid and has no A.C. dont touch it i warn you unless your shots are up to date or a bad case of tetanus surely awaits! in the parking lot of the gym see my teeth baring grin as i laugh at the spectacle i create as i pull alongside your 30,000 dollar ride try to ignore the horrific smell no the car is not on fire the hood just contains emissions from the bowels of hell no the cars not on fire, the smoke that you see is the transmission fluid that leaks steadily and smokes readily my car is determined to humiliate me! __________________ I'd like to call you my wild horse and feed you silver sage Andrea an eye for an eye makes the world blind

03-08-2006, 06:33 PM	#2
Little Bird Administrator Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Wicklow, Ireland Posts: 6,178 Rep Power: 10	Ya know what....I know exactly what you mean! I am sick of car trouble. __________________ In the end...only kindness matters MysteriousWisdom

09-04-2006, 04:46 PM	#4
Eibhlin Oscillating Fan Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: North Cackalacky Posts: 2,044 Rep Power: 254	Lol, THANKFULLY we no longer own the car this poem is dedicated to. I now drive a super-sexy Ford Aerostar mini-van with a gimpy sliding door! When frustration with the door turns to poetic inspiration chances are I will add a new ode here- __________________ I'd like to call you my wild horse and feed you silver sage Andrea an eye for an eye makes the world blind

09-04-2006, 08:06 PM	#5
ItBeThatWay27 Gary, 'Disposable-Hero' Join Date: May 2006 Location: Austin, Texas Posts: 2,242 Rep Power: 0	Car trouble sucks... __________________ so close no matter how far couldn't be much more from the heart forever trusting who we are and nothing else matters

09-05-2006, 03:25 AM	#8
last_dance_rodeo Temporarily Absent Mod Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: South Dakota Posts: 2,212 Rep Power: 251	oh that looks pretty i want that __________________ Her face is moonworn and thin, she's been wishing on too many stars again.

09-03-2006, 08:20 PM	#3
randallflagg Seb Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: paris , france Posts: 168 Rep Power: 217	I don't understand your magnificent poem andrea, 'cause I have no car and driving licence.

09-04-2006, 09:37 PM	#7
Little Bird Administrator Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Wicklow, Ireland Posts: 6,178 Rep Power: 10	My husbands car was sitting in our driveway for 6 months. We spent over €1500 (about $2000) buying new parts and paying mechanics and it was exactly the same even after all of that. Luckily, I got a new job and a payrise to we bought a brand new car. We share it and still have my Opel Astra as our second car. The new car we bought is a Nissan Almera. It doesn't rock my world or anything. It is practical and affordable but it's new and I love it!! Best bit is...it works!!! It doesn't break down, it doesn't judder at traffic lights. It doesn't reduce me to sweet talking or even begging it to work. It just works and works well. It also has climate control and with the summer we had, we used it!! Here's what it looks like http://www.nissan.ie/vehicles/passen...4/exterior.asp

09-05-2006, 11:18 AM	#9
ItBeThatWay27 Gary, 'Disposable-Hero' Join Date: May 2006 Location: Austin, Texas Posts: 2,242 Rep Power: 0	Juddering at traffic lights! thats funny b/c the Geo I was driving used to do that bad ha ha sometimes when I'd go to take off it would hesitate and kind of hold off for a second if I could have any car in the world, it would definately be a Delorean DMC: damn that car is sweet! __________________ so close no matter how far couldn't be much more from the heart forever trusting who we are and nothing else matters

09-05-2006, 10:45 PM	#10
Eibhlin Oscillating Fan Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: North Cackalacky Posts: 2,044 Rep Power: 254	lol! well, i may be inspired by the van soon, the door is so obnoxious! gah, we have had so many gimpy cars--umm, over 14 in 10 years i think, i made a MySpace blog about it in fact :lmao2: i would paste it here, but it would take half a web page:lmao2: __________________ I'd like to call you my wild horse and feed you silver sage Andrea an eye for an eye makes the world blind

09-05-2006, 10:49 PM	#12
Eibhlin Oscillating Fan Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: North Cackalacky Posts: 2,044 Rep Power: 254	oh heck I will just post it You read it right, in 11 years we have had 16 cars!! 1. 1994 Ford Ranger, red, it was a fun little truck. I call it the dating days truck because well, Joe had it when we first started dating and were first married. There are some good memories attached to it! 2. 1987 Jeep Cherokee Laredo, maroon, this was my first car. I loved it, it was alot of fun. Well aside from that pesky starter solenoid getting stuck. We had a hammer and piece of cardboard in the back of that thing, because when it didn't start, you had to crawl under it to bang on the starter to unstick it. I went 4 wheeling down the horse trails in it, it took us to NH and back a billion times, it was alot of fun. I miss it sometimes. 3. Buick LeSabre, light blue, this was the most reliable vehicle we ever had. And it had the COLDEST ac ever! Unfortunately it was destroyed in a head on collision with a Cadillac. I hate Cadillacs. 4. Subaru Legacy, dark gray, we owned this briefly while waiting for the insurance settlement. It was a good little car, we gave it to some friends who needed it more than we did. 5. 1993 Jeep Grand Cherokee, green, tan leather int. This could have been the best vehicle ever, it sure was pretty, and comfortable and looked good. But it didn't survive delivery driving and soon died. Biggest waste of $10,000 ever. Plus it would slip out of park and roll down the parking lot at Domino's, so if you own a Grand Cherokee years 93-98, use you parking brake!!! 6. 1991? Ford Taurus, piece of crap. Enough said. I "totalled" it by accidentally backing into Joe's Chevy. Smashed in the rear end of the car, barely scratched the trucks bumper. Imagine driving a car the drives crooked (bad alignment) and had the rear end smashed in. I wrote "My car is uglier than yours" on the trunk in black sharpie to lighten the mood. 7. 1991? Chevy corsica, red. This car was free, it was a good car for being on it's last leg. Then the spark plug blew out and wouldn't stay in anymore, so everywhere I drove it spewed exhaust fumes into the car while making a noise rivaling any helicopter, trust me, people KNEW when we were coming. Plus it would overheat and driving anywhere put at risk of carbon monoxide poisoning. But it was great til the spark plug incident! 8. 1994? Chrysler Concorde, black, gray leather interior. I liked this car alot, my aunt and uncle gave it to us, so it had alot of sentimetal value. It had a good stereo system too, which was fun. we eventually sold it. 9. Ford Aerostar, green, I never thought I would drive a Ford minivan, but here I am. It is a good van and it has cold ac and lots of room. I hope it runs for a long time so we don't have to make car payments for a long time! 10. 1994?? Ford F-150, red, this was my dad's truck. We inherited it last year after my dad died of cancer. It is a great truck, and just in time for Joe to have it for his installation business! Thank you dad and Mary! Joe's trucks: 11. 1976? Ford F-100, what a piece of crap! And to think we spent so much money trying to fix it up! the real kicker is that the roof was so rusted that when we sold it, the guy who bought it from us was driving down the highway and the roof BLEW OFF! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 12. 198?? Chevy full sized pick up. This was a really good truck, until the engine blew. It is still missed, well its still sitting in our driveway, but we miss driving it. 13. Dodge Dakota, this truck was...interesting! Lol, it was good for what we paid for it and it lasted a while for us too. Honorable mentions: 14. 1981 Chevy Camaro, metallic blue, it was pretty, and that is as far as it went. It looked good and didnt run for crap! 15. 1976? Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme, bug ugly metallic gold. Yes, I said metallic gold. It was Joe's car. Enough said! 16. 197?? Toyota little pickup, it was a beater. Joe drove it on the dirt roads a few times, then we gave it back. I think that is it, I HOPE that is it!! Rigth now in addition to our van and truck we have a Cavalier we are going to fix up and sell, and Joe has a 77 Honda 450 he is going to fix up and keep. __________________ I'd like to call you my wild horse and feed you silver sage Andrea an eye for an eye makes the world blind